Wednesday 22 October 2008

As simple as this?

So I'm wondering how it works. One wakes up in the morning, shuffles out of bed, looks skeptically in the mirror and says, "OH-MY-GOD, it all makes sense now, I'm a guy. All these years I've suffered in my girl skin when I was always a guy. And OH-MY-GOD, looking at my face from this angle, I'm soooo totally a guy!!! That's it I'm off to the surgeon. The days of being trapped in girl skin are so over!"

Is that how it works?? Simple as??

Personally, I wouldn't be surprised if it really did work that way. Given how this world has evolved to make way for a million and one phobias - what's in a girl thinking she might actually be a bloke?! Nah, nothing wrong with that! - we'll just give the condition a name and get on with it!! Seriously though - here's a task for you - toddle over this website (http://phobialist.com/index.html) that will, in 5 minutes, turn you into a living miracle - one person, 137 phobias. And a minute ago you were thinking you were normal?! Ignorance, terrible thing!!

Ok moving back to me now. See I was thinking the other day - 20 years from now, I might wake up one morning, slightly miffed at mother nature. Distressed I would ask her, " Why oh why did you make me Indian? You of all the people in the whole wide wide world must have known what I am inside!"

"What are you inside, child?," I'm guessing she'd ask.

"You know how Chinese I feel inside, and you still made me Indian. I mean, it wasn't even like you had a quota of Chinese people you were allowed to make or anything. Infact you filled the world with them, they are everywhere, even in Mauritia! Why the unfairness? Why me?" That's possibly how my complaint would be contructed. Add the expressions, the voice and the tears. And a scowl. Maybe a bit of nail biting.

And mother nature would smile down at me and says, " My dear child, don't you know? These days the doctors can even turn you Chinese! You feel Chinese? Go, be Chinese now! There is a way!

"Wohooo," I say and " Weheeyy," I say. I can finally be me!

It's going to be as simple as that!

I even did some grafitti to prove my point!


Its a mad, mad world. Mad.

Sana
x
Ps: I hope my blog doesn't upset people. I have nothing against the Chinese or the Indian or the Mauritious or the bloke who thinks he's a girl! I love them. And for the record I have nothing against those with 137 phobias. I come in peace.

21 comments:

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

Hmm different from your usual ones, but delightful all the same! By the way whats your obbsession with being chinese? Be proud of the indian-ness..neway we all belong to the same continent!

Omg theres' one for nida: Alektorophobia- Fear of chickens. Can't believe it exists!

Aww

Unknown said...

... and mother nature would say

"well I didnt even have a quota for indian people you know!" *shrugs*


*no offence intended, just for laufs. cudnt resist the urge :P

Unknown said...

lolz, that was funny...i would have been left speechless if mother nature did say that :)

i dont have any particular obession with chinese people....only that theres so many of them that whenever i think of anyone different from me i think "chinese" lol

finalllyyyy! nida's phobia has a name attached to it lol
sana
x

siras said...

LOL!! Why would you want to be chinese?

Though, there is one major advantage of being chinese you get to eat chinese food all the time!!! :D But then, it might lose its charm! hmm.. :P

Unknown said...

hmm, interesting thought...so im better of being indian then - it helps me appreciate chinese food :)

Anonymous said...

I've always wondered strange stuff like this!
I'm Indian too, and see no difference in culture from others, the more people I come across in this world, I realise that deep down we are all the same.
:)
Yeppp, Chinese food is delish!

siras said...

You've been tagged!

Anonymous said...

I keep telling my sister she looks Chinese!

@siras: Chinese never drink cold water. And did I send you that very yummy foods pictures email? Or did you get the food pictures they served during the Chinese Olympics at the food street in Beijing? You'll hate Chinese food for the rest of your life!

Anonymous said...

Phobophobia- Fear of phobias, this one's goood!!!

siras said...

Where, where, where is the tag my friend???

@SAWJ: I do know Chinese don't drink cold water, and that e-mail was ABSOLUTELY disgusting. I didn't have my dinner after seeing that!! And thank God, I didn't see the food pictures served during the Chinese Olympics!

Anonymous said...

@siras: Don't worry, I'll send them to you if I still have them.

And the Chinese, if they could cook poop, they would!

Unknown said...

we all havea bit of chinese in us.....coem to think of it....i've eaten goats brain, liver, kidney, tongue, heart,hoof and lungs......to someone who was vegetarian that would be disgusting....
i mean some people might actuallly enjoy eating poop.....i know baby elephants do :)

Anonymous said...

And pigs!

You ate goat hooves? How?

Unknown said...

erm...cook them? i'm sure you have eaten them too, (depending on what part of the world you come from)

Anonymous said...

Hooves? Come on!

You're not talking about paayay, are you?

I'm in Pakistan.

Unknown said...

yes yes.....thats what I'm talking about...it is the hoof, isn't it???!!

If you're in Pakistan you must have defintiely had them!


Sana

Anonymous said...

Paayay are the legs, after the knees and above the hooves. Yup I've had them, pretty good but very sticky!

Unknown said...

nooo - im certain its the hoof...cuz i remember eating a hoof shaped thing!! unlessi ate something i wasn't supposed to!!!!!

true on stickiness O_o

Unknown said...

nooo - im certain its the hoof...cuz i remember eating a hoof shaped thing!! unlessi ate something i wasn't supposed to!!!!!

true on stickiness O_o

Unknown said...

eww you ate a hoof..and brain chi chi chi...i swear paaye is the fat around the hoof or something...I cant touch it coz it reminds me of bulghum...EWW...sorry guys i know its disgusting..hope I havent put you guys off ;)

xx