Thursday 27 November 2008

I have a criminal mind

Excusez moi, if I make myself bold and speak in honesty. Yes, I do happen to possess a mind that has criminal inclinations - not that I have stepped out and tripped an old lady or poured salt over a harmless slug making its tedious crawl home-wards.

But every so often I find myself thinking - What if I salted that slug? What if, accidentally (of course) I happen to step on one? Which would be worse - stepping on it while wearing stilettos or flats?

And equally often, I wonder what would happen if I did actually indulge in making my thoughts happen for real.

Every time I walk past a busker on the Tube, I instinctively look at the change he's managed to collect, in spite of his horrid entertaining skills. And I wonder to myself if anyone would be cruel enough to steal his hard earned cash - well, it would be quite easy to do this you see. They don't necessarily have electric fencing surrounding their collection boxes. And come to think of it, it wouldn't be very hard to pick the bowl and run - it would take the busker forever to put down his guitar, gather his senses and run after the petty thief. And I've come to the conclusion that this is do-able. Would I do it myself? Erm, lets leave it at that!

Ok, my criminal thoughts don't stop here..... While waiting for the tube/train everyday I take great care to leave a 1 metre distance between myself and the edge of the platform. Why? Well, what if some one pushed me!! I can't imagine why any person would be overcome by an exceptionally violent urge to give little me a nudge and tip me off the platform, but WHAT IF?! Just in case someone might be thinking like me, I dig my feel into the ground (figuratively) and keep my distance.

The more I think about this the more evidence I find which would surely class me as criminal!

12 comments:

siras said...

LOL! Sana, your mind still works in an crazy a manner as it used to before! :p

siras said...

*as

Unknown said...

lol, they are valid thoughts.....and maybe im not the only one....maybe ur a slug killer too :P

siras said...

Valid point... I might be a slug killer too :P

Unknown said...

undercover*
lol

siras said...

That actually sounds like fun! :P We could do this undercover and nobody would ever know! :P

Hope no one's reading this! ;)

Unknown said...

well, to be honest, im not sure there would be anyone, apart from a few environMENTALs (lmao at that)that would have issues with people joining hands against slugs - no body likes them or the slug!!!

and if somebody else does read this and agrees - its only going to help our casuse ;) lol

siras said...

LOL @ environMENTALs :p

Let's see how many more people want to join hands against slugs! lol!

Anonymous said...

Girls are crazy! :P

Unknown said...

@sania: haha, environMENTALS came all of a sudden, caught me unexpectedly too - lmao

@SAWJ - welll, yeah - you'll have to come to terms with it - alot of people have tried,...thats life :P
on the upside though, girls DEFINTELY have more fun than boys!!! i can say that with complete confidence!! therefore craziness aint all that bad!!
see, sania and i could easily start off and maintain a conversation about fighting slugs - could you ?!

sana
x

Unknown said...

once again, your blog entry proves to be as amusing and entertaining as the rest! keep it up!

sana you jst think of pouring salt over a slug...I actually HAVE done it...what does that make me :s It was at my khalamami's house and I think it was a majlis the next day so we had to clean up and there was a slg in the kitchen..we poured namak over the slimy thing and jst watched it SHRIVEL into a ball of goo..omg i'm a murderer :|

P.S When you become a writer, I'll write your reviews yeh?!!!

Unknown said...

lol, I'd love you to write the reviews....I'd be a guarenteed success lol

much love
sana